What are the ingredients of love? Does love always inspire positive feelings? (Кои са съставките на любовта? Само положителни чувства ли поражда любовта?)
Някой, ако може да намери такова есе общо за двата въпроса, няма значение дали е на английски или на български, ще съм му много благодарна! :) Есето ми е за вторник 17.06.2008
elitututu
06-15-2008, 20:08
Recently one of my friends got dumped by her boyfriend. She was dumped exactly eight months to the day when they first began dating. I met the man she was dating only a handful of times. I did not dislike the guy, but I didn't think he was a great catch either. My friend claims she has been destroyed by this break-up and that she will never find a "love" like this one again.
Hearing her say that she loved him bothered me. I have been in a relationship for over three years and I definitely love the person that I am involved with. I have a simple recipe for love. The ingredients for love are: trust, respect, mutual adoration, attraction, and the possession of similar morals and values by both parties.
Here's the trick to love. All of the ingredients for the above recipe have to be stirred in and incorporated equally.
Think about it. You can trust, respect and adore someone, but if you are not physically attracted to the other person, then what you end up with is more of a strong friendship than love. If you trust, respect, and are attracted to your partner, but you really don't possess the same morals or values, then your relationship will inevitably deteriorate. I hope that I don't need to explain that even the strongest physical attraction with the absence of all of the other ingredients is simply lust, not love.
Now, let's get back to my friend's story. I mentioned earlier that I didn't think her boyfriend was a great catch. I'll provide you with his stats. He is 29 years old. Currently, he is employed, but during several months of their relationship he was not. He smokes and is balding. He drinks daily and dedicates certain nights of the week to going to specific bars. For example, every Tuesday night he can always be found at a bar called The Pub with his friends, even during the months when he was unemployed and should have been working on his resume. Do I need to point out the idiocy of a jobless man having a designated bar night each week? I hope not. One more thing, he still lives with his parents.
elitututu
06-15-2008, 20:09
There is not time to do more than make a passing note upon each of these ingredients. Love is Patience. This is the normal attitude of Love; Love passive, Love waiting to begin; not in a hurry, calm; ready to do its work when the summons comes, but meantime wearing the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit. Love suffers long; beareth all things; believeth all things; hopeth all things. For Love understands, and therefore waits.
Kindness. Love active. have you ever noticed how much of Christ's life was spent in doing kind things--in merely doing kind things? Run over it with that in view, and you will find that He spent a great proportion of His time simply in making people happy, in doing good turns to people. There is only one thing greater than happiness in the world, and that is holiness; and it is not in our keeping; but what God has put in our power is the happiness of those about us, and that is largely to be secured by our being kind to them.
"The greatest thing," says someone, "a man can do for his Heavenly Father is to be kind to some of His other children." I wonder why it is that we are not all kinder than we are? How much the world need it. How easily it is done. How instantaneously it acts. How infallibly it is remembered. How super abundantly it pays itself back--for there is no debtor in the world so honourable, so superbly honourable, as Love. "Love never faileth." Love is success, Love is happiness, Love is life. "Love, I say," with Browning, "is energy of Life."
For life, with all it yields of joy and woe
And hope and fear,
Is just our chance o' the prize of learning love--
How love might be, hath been indeed, and is."
Where Love is, God is. He that dwelleth in Love dwelleth in God. God is love. Therefore love. Without distinction, without calculation, without procrastination, love. Lavish it upon the poor, where it is very easy; especially upon the rich, who often need it most; most of all upon our equals, where it is very difficult, and for whom perhaps we each do least of all.
There is a difference between trying to please and giving pleasure. Lose no chance of giving pleasure. For that is the ceaseless and anonymous triumph of a truly loving spirit. "I shall pass through this world but once. Any good thing therefore that I can do, or any kindness that I can show to any human being, let me do it now. Let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again